Liability

Oh my! Why does this word have to be a part of my life?!?!?! I hate that we have deteriorated so badly in our world that we worry more about the risk involved in a situation rather than the life! Who am I to be judge over what someone should want to do during their lifetime?

I pray that I always find it in my heart to do what is good and right, that I can overcome any fear of liability and CARE! For pete sake is that not what we are here for??? LOVE your neighbor as you love yourself... there it is again, is that it? Did we forget to love ourselves? Oh, yeah, we're indulgent but do we see ourselves as loved, blessed, worthy of love? Is that the issue?

Wow, we have strayed so far from what Father intended for us as people! We're more into ritual rather than relationship, appearances rather than heart! So what's my role? Big sigh! To love and be loved! What a daunting task! I think I'm getting the loved part, Father help me to get the "to love" part!

I so love what I get to do with my life! To advocate for people is huge! It is so frustrating at times but wow, to get to be a part of encouraging someone, making their life just a bit richer... I just gotta keep remembering that I also need to love me!

Okay, blogging is cathartic! BIG woo hoo here! I'm so fortunate, I sit on my porch with the breeze blowing, my puppy at my feet and a cup of coffee and know that life is good, God is great and I'm truly loving the journey that I am on, it's just a hard one! What doesn't kill me is making me stronger! HA!

TTFN, gotta get ready to face the day, but first I have a dog to play with and wash, he stinks!

Disaster

What a crazy couple of days! There have been several people in my life who seem like they are having problems and everything they do and anything I might do (and in some cases have to say) only serve to make their situation worse. Unfortunately it is truly my JOB to see to their safety and well being and right now I'm nothing but a nasty bitch. Everything this person is doing is causing the situation to deteriorate... why do people do this? It seems that they get on a merry go round of destruction that just goes faster and faster. I have two people in my life on that awful downward spiral. I remember getting like that and it's SO hard to make it stop! It has to be by conscious effort! I want to know how to disarm this kind of thing, to see it on the horizon and help it be avoided.

I also have had two conversations with one of the most negative, nastiest people I have encountered. I've had to work hard not to become angered and give back what I am getting. Fortunate for me I have been well versed in the subject in question. It's been a great exercise in keeping my composure and keeping my personal opinions to myself.

Then there are my personal disasters with Russell's health, Mom's health and Val's health... BIG sigh! How will I take those issues? I've had to exercise keeping my mouth shut and my opinions to myself, keep my faith set on "high" and be patient! Why do I bother to blog this? I really don't know. I'm not certain that it helps anyone but me... I don't think that's wrong.

Russell will be going to visit the Stouts on 4/21, just days away and I get to go the end of May taking Mom to see 5 of her 6 great grandkids, two of whom she has never met! Hopefully she will be feeling better by then, after another heart cath. I so want to be a good daughter to her... she doesn't make it easy, I'm constantly at arms length. AND on 5/28 I will do my first 5K... haven't begun to train yet... Helen Bogus offered to train with me. Do I want that? Do I need it? Does she? Will it help? Will it hurt? I have no clue... we'll see by and by! With that, I say bye-bye for now!!!